Define Normality
by Azzandra
Summary: Adie is having a bad day. Sander's day is just taking an ugly turn. And Lord Frizzles must be the most abused Petpet this side of Meridell! This is why two Eyries shouldn't be left unsupervised (complete).


Adie flipped through the last pages of her Algebra book. Well, technically, it wasn't hers, she had... borrowed it, from her brother while he was visiting the lab ray,but all hopes of an interesting read were firmly crushed. Now she understood why her owner was always one step from failing Math.

The electric Eyrie snorted, stricken by sudden fits of laughter. Since she hadn't exactely read the whole book, it didn't go poof and disappear. Checking the time, she realized there was enough time to stealthily place the book back in Shaduinn's room.

Inny, as his nickname went, had one unusual quirk: he was a clean-freak. Often, Adie had had to throw blunt objects after him so he'd get out of her room, which he tried to "organize". And even then, he'd take said objects and try to sterilize them! She had even had to save her own Petpet from Inny's soap-imbued paws, because Lockheed the Gallion had recently learned to bite and she didn't want him to get some strange infection. Lockheed, not Inny.

Adie closed the book and looked up. From her position on the bed, she could see the door of her room, open wide. However, what had caught her attention was Lord Frizzles.

His Lordship Frizzles had been brought home one cold afternoon by Vulpis, Adie's owner. The Wuzzle- because that was His Lordship's species- was standing docilely on Vulpis' owner. Unceremoniously, he was dropped in Sander's lap, Adie's other brother. The blue Eyrie stared at the creature for a good fifty seconds before intelligently saying, "That's a Wuzzle..." Across the room, Adie had snorted and had returned her attention to the TV.

"Yes, a Wuzzle," Vulpis continued enthusiastically. "His Lordship needs a bath. Scoot."

And the human had shooed her Eyrie off the couch and kicked her shoes off.

Unfortunately, she had forgotten to mention that Wuzzles could only be bathed with gasoline (not actual gasoline, mind you, just a Wuzzle-variety shampoo that emanated a powerful smell, similar to gasoline). Unappreciative of being hosed down with water by Sander, Frizzles had stuck true to his name and had singed him pretty badly.

But after that, Sander and Lord Frizzles had developed an unusual camaraderie- apparently with only purpose of torturing Adie.

She was not amused.

So upon seeing her miniature nemesis in her doorframe, eying her with that look of blatant superiority (he wasn't a lord for nothing!), Adie had done the logical thing (in her mind, at least)and had lunged. She had lunger with the Algebra book right towards the Wuzzle and tried to smother the pest with it. For a moment, while the book covered the Petpet, she had thought herself victorious. Unfortunately, just as thin ribbon of smoke rose from underneath the cover, she had realised her mistake.

Paper was flammable. Books were made of paper. And because one and one made two, Adie made her next mistake. She raised the book and while assessing damage, payed no heed to the now-angered Wuzzle. And Lord Frizzles was not amused, either. He singed the Eyrie's paws and she yelped, taking a step back.

If Lord Frizzles had a quick temper, Adie had this tooand a slow wit. She lunged for the Wuzzle to smother it again with the book, now sustaining heavy scorch marks. But His Lordship dodged and soon enough was running down the stairs, towards the kitchen and the back door, obviously seeking out his owner.

"Hey, I'm not done here!" Adie croned, a frightful sight as she jumped over the stairs in a flurry of feathers, talons and singed paper.

Meanwhile, outside, it was a beautiful day indeed. Though the air was cool, it only enhanced the freshness of early spring. The sun was "grinning", as Vulpis said on days it offered no heat. "See? It's showing us its' teeth."

Sander inspired deeply and let out a happy sigh. Then, the blue Eyrie faked a cough and straightened his feathers, figuring that some in his position had to show no weakness.

The back yard of The Perch (an interesting nickname their house had gotten due to its shape and the fact that, each morning, Crokabeks from all 'round Meridell found fit to rest on it, incurring the wrath of Vulpis and making her try to hose them down, all while cursing in a definite non PG-13 manner, but in Romanian to keep it safe. But that was besides the subject) was currently hosting a strange ensemble of individuals. Why, if Sander's owner found out, she'd probably-

Actually, Sander wasn't sure WHAT the excentric girl would do. Probably go around saying cheap jokes ("Did ya hear the one about the Faerie and the Jelly Factory?"). Or hose them down. Either would scare them off. And he couldn't have none of that, now could he?

The array of Neopets sitting on the grass were currently chattering happily. Sander had to stop this immediatly. Perched on the lawn furniture (an immense plastic table and a run-down old chair Vulpis had probably snagged from the Meridell junkyard), he cleared his throat in what he thought was a sagely way.

They kept talking.

"Excuse me," he said patiently.

They didn't even look at him.

Okay, measures had to be taken.

"LISTEN UP, YOU LITTLE BRATS!"

Everybody's attention was focused on the blue Eyrie in front of them. Sander smiled and leaned a paw on the edge of the round plastic table.

"Alright, now, I-"

SMACK! THUD! Laughter...

It appeared Sander had leaned a tad heavily on the table, because it toppled over, towards him, smacking him in the beak and, as soon as he was already on the ground and humiliated, coming down over him. Though the assistance was amused, Sander was not. Picking himself up and trying to save the last shreds of dignity he might had possessed, he arranged the table back up as the last chuckles died out.

Sander let out a growl and everyone was silent again.

"Now," he continued, "I welcome you here, my dear minions! If you are here, then surely you wish to aid me in taking over Neopia!"

"Naw, I'm just here for the free food!" a yellow Acara replied from the back. Another wave of laughter ensued.

"Okay, then, you're here because you wish to aid me in taking over Neopia OR for the free food!" Sander said, restraining himself from rolling his eyes.

"Actually, I'm lost. I thought this was the Book Club!" a pink Aisha piped up, waving a paw, slightly distressed. "Mind telling me which way to Brightvale?"

Sander sighed. This was going to be one long afternoon.

But all other thoughts concerning the futility of manipulating such simple minds died out as behind him, the door openned, smacking him in the back and sending him flying over the table, rolling on his back on the other side and the table falling over him once more.

"COME BACK HERE, VERMIN!"

"Adelaeide!" Sander blurted out in shock, as his eldest sibling lunged after his adored Petpet, trying to attack Lord Frizzles with- an Algebra book!

Adie took no heed of Sander or the crowd, and as His Lordship scurried towards the mass of Neopets, she pursued. However, a Wuzzle was small and agile, while Eyries were large, bulking creatures, mostly composed of muscles, feathers and brute strength. Understandably, panic was inevitable when you saw something three times your size pouncing like a maniac towards you.

So panic was created. The mismatched crowd Sander had painstakingly gathered scurried in whichever direction, over, under and through the fence, trying to escape the enraged Eyrie. After everyone was gone, Adie stood in the middle of the yard, book over her head, breathing heavily, trying to figure out where Lord Frizzles had disappeared to.

Sander took this moment to be angry. Very, very angry.

"ADEL!" Sander screeched, kicking the table off and sending it crashing towards a piece of fence that was already barely standing. "WHAT do you THINK you DOING!"

But before Adie could prepare a response, another voice interjected.

"No! What do you BOTH think you're doing!"

Both Eyries turned and faced their owner, Vulpis in all her minor glory. Next to her, a Desert Kacheek that was undoubtably Shaduinn, fresh from the lab ray, looked at them with amusement.

"We-"

"I-"

"She-"

"-his fault!"

Vulpis pursed her lips and tapped her foot. For her pets, the message was clear.

That night...

Vulpis stretched and yawned, leaning further back on the couch. Shaduinn stood next to her.

"So, Adie's buying you a new book out of her allowance?" she asked while sturning the TV off.

"Yes, she promised to do so," Shaduinn replied.

"Ah. Tell her I told you she has to buy three other books at your choosing as well."

"Quite generous of you."

"I would have made it five, but I hate Algebra," the owner replied with amusement.

"And Sander?"

"Cleaning his closet. I told him that if he can manage to conquer whatever's skulking in there, he's allowed to try taking over Neopia as well."

Shaduinn stifled a chuckle. The Eyrie would never manage to clean his closet, and Vulpis knew this. Sander knew this as well.

"So, he's scratching the world domination plans?"

"Mmm-hmmm," Vulpis nodded, yawning again.

"He actually thought he was being original, you know."

The girl smiled.

"Yup. So I told him he can at least be original about fixing the fence."

"He's going to pay somebody to do it, you know." Because, indeed, Sander had even offered him a stack of codestones in exchange of cleaning the Eyrie's closet.

"Not with his allowance blocked." And Vulpis smiled devilishly. Shaduinn choked at the sheer brilliance of that punishment. Sander was highly dependant on his allowance.

"Well, I'm turning in," Vulpis said, yawning for the umpteenth time that night.

"Yeah. Hey, guess you were wrong this morning. It wasn't such a normal day, after all."

At this Vulpis tilted her head, widened her smile and challanged:

"Define normality!"

THE END


End file.
